So, yesterday was my my little bird's one week birthday. Eep! Already? Feels like less and it also feels like MONTHS. lol.
It also marks being home from the hospital for 5 days. I had so many panic attacks in the hospital, but I didn't expect to have as many here at home. (call me crazy) I'm having so much trouble being in the present. Just thinking about how scary the future is, just thinking about my husband going back to work next week, the thoughts take over.
My mind is going a million miles a minute in FEAR. And I know it's making my husband sad and I really hate making my husband sad :( I know I need to have a mindset makeover to think about "there is" instead of thinking "there is ONLY". "There is ONLY 3 hours till his next bottle" "There is ONLY a few days until you go to work."
It's SUPER hard to change your mind, especially when it's scared poop-less. But it's seriously hindering the time I have left with my husband home, the time where my baby is this tiny, and I don't want to wait until it's too late to fix it.
I will say, it IS comforting that even the strongest women I know STILL felt/feel all these big huge feelings after coming home from the hospital, so there's that at least right? We're never alone in our feelings. They are NORMAL, and they are OKAY. We are NOT alone. <3 <3 Amen. :)
Sending love and cupcakes out to everyone.